And today, I'm doing so. By going on a run, washing my hair, and laying in bed till I fall asleep watching Parenthood. This week has been quite honestly the hardest work week for me ever. I cried. I was nervous. I got anxious. I had major anxiety. I was stressed. And fell asleep at 8:30 almost every night. But I made it! It's Friday, and I'm sitting here blasting my music and dancing around.
Because it's true. We need to celebrate every tiny victory. Don't beat yourself up if maybe instead of running two miles, you ran one. Don't be ashamed that you didn't feel like getting up this morning to clean and will do it tomorrow instead. Take the time for yourself. I have now realized to appreciate your time. That time alone, with you and your thoughts, or enjoying what you want to do...is really just so precious. Your happiness matters first. Within that, celebrate the tough times you achieved. I am one to constantly play the woe-is-me game, and one that will think the world is ending after one thing fails. I'm starting to really understand, take one day at a time. And when you're younger, you feel rushed. You feel like everything needs to be done now, now, NOW. And I'm not saying we should sit around and wait, or expect things to be handed to us, but you'll understand soon enough just how amazing it is, to sit, after working your ass off for a week. The achievements for whatever it is you've done, that you thought was fucking hard, is blissful. You did it!
So tonight, I'm dancing to Walk The Moon (Avalanche, if you're wondering. Listen to it. I'll admit to stop folding my laundry every beat or two so I can twirl around for a bit.) And letting myself snack on some kale chips.
Be proud of who you are. Where you're at in life. What you've done, and what you've achieved. These pieces make you. Be happy. Smile. Spread happiness.
Just really happy today! Life is crazy. We wouldn't have it any other way though. Happy Friday, guys!
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Maybe my thoughts run too much. And maybe I overthink things. I don't use the right words, and I say things incorrectly. I love run-on sentences and I always repeat things. Always. But this is how I write and whether it be college-worthy or not, I love to write.
Now, I've tried this blogging thing for a long time. I've restarted with many things. I am super naive in this world. But I think being able to say what I want and throw it out there is going to help me so much.
I'm about to move out, on my own. My own place. I live alone now, as of November, but this new home will be under my name. My own furniture. My own Wi-Fi, like what? I'm excited to be able to call a place a home. I look forward to it. Especially the decorating! I've learned to be alone, and to many that sounds a bit sad, but it's really not. I loved being independent. Coming home and cooking myself dinner has been the most therapeutic thing for me. Especially knowing you've provided it all on your own. I'm slowly jotting ideas down of what I want things to look like. It's crazy being a grown up. I seriously still feel like I'm at least 17 years old. Mentally. So this is all very strange to me.
Not sure how long I'll be doing this and how often. But I like it that way. Let's not make any promises just yet, let's just...feel this out...